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:iconelegantfaith: More from ElegantFaith


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Poetry by 91816119


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Submitted on
February 20, 2011
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I moved before the winter storm
    the grass was dead; the trees were torn
        There was no moon-
    the sky was dim

        I moved before the storm.

You sang arpeggios late at night
    to dolls that sat in lantern light.
        The walls were bare,
    the world was dead

        I moved before the storm.

The clouds began to drown us out,
    you stayed alone, I headed south.
        The water sank one drop a time.
    You kept your dolls,
        I abandoned mine.

Now our apartment, Brooklyn bound
      saw Coney Island sink the ground
        The East River- The Hudson Bay
    You got stuck
        I sailed away.

Now your dolls, a New York hue
    Washed up on Ocean Avenue
        There's still no moon, the sky is bare-

I moved before the storm.
Ah, my friend, all good things must end. :(
I miss Brooklyn. I miss you.

---

Thank you for the DLD.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconautumnlit:
autumnlit Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2013
:blackrose: Your lovely poetry has been featured here: fav.me/d6ogtjc
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:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2013   Writer
Wow, late to the party much?  Haha, thanks!  I actually don't come on deviant art that much anymore so that's why my comment is a few months late.  Perhaps I should start coming back. 
Anyway, thanks for the feature.  I appreciate it.  :D
Reply
:iconautumnlit:
autumnlit Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2013
I'm away a lot my self. ;) It's always nice to come back and catch up when there's time. The feature was my pleasure! ^^
Reply
:iconragnaice:
ragnaice Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Wonderfully readable :thumbsup:
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2012   Writer
Thank you :)
Reply
:iconjessica35:
jessica35 Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
Love this!!
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012   Writer
Thank you :D
Reply
:icondailylitdeviations:
DailyLitDeviations Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by =DailyLitDeviations in a news article that can be found here: [link]

Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by :+fav:ing the News Article. Keep writing and keep creating.
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012   Writer
Goodness! Thank you so much! I'm flattered. :)
Reply
:iconretrubutionist777:
Retrubutionist777 Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This is very, very lovely! I love your style of poetry, it's so unique!
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2012   Writer
Thank you. :)
Reply
:iconpooreccentric:
PoorEccentric Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2012  Student Writer
Wow, the rhythm in this was great, not to mention it's creativity. I also loved the strong emotion in the piece. Very good poetry.
Reply
:iconathreana:
Athreana Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012
I second to PoorEccentric! The rhythm is really powerful! =)
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2012   Writer
Thank you for taking the time to read. :D
Reply
:iconautumnlit:
autumnlit Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2012
Your deviation has been featured: [link] =)
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:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2012   Writer
Wow, thank you so much! :hug:
Reply
:iconautumnlit:
autumnlit Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2012
You're welcome! :huggle:
Reply
:iconautumnlit:
autumnlit Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2012
This was beautiful. The rhyming was wonderful and the poem is so moving. :hug:
Wonderful job!
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2012   Writer
Thank you for taking the time to read. :hug: It means a lot.
Reply
:iconautumnlit:
autumnlit Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2012
You're welcome! Looking forward to seeing more. =)
Reply
:iconhippiehebe:
HippieHebe Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Not a fan of rhyming poetry, but I really like this. the imagery is lovely :)
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2012   Writer
Thank you. :)
Reply
:iconamycornelson:
AmyCornelson Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2012  Student General Artist
This is beautiful =) It's a truly inspiring piece. =) Well done!
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2012   Writer
Thank you :)
Reply
:iconamycornelson:
AmyCornelson Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2012  Student General Artist
You're welcome! :)
Reply
:iconadagiobunny:
Adagiobunny Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Student Writer
This flows so beautifully! As someone commented below me, nothing about the rhymes or the rhythm you've used feels forced, and that is hard to come by in pieces that rhyme. I also adore the imagery. Wonderful job!
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2012   Writer
Thank you for all the compliments. I'm glad you enjoyed reading this. :)
Reply
:iconadagiobunny:
Adagiobunny Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2012  Student Writer
You're very welcome! It was a lovely read. :)
Reply
:iconwolf-kin:
Wolf-kin Featured By Owner Feb 29, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
So I have a bit of a vendetta against rhymes and regular meter because most of the time, these days, they turn out very dr-seuss. But this is lovely; it has a cadence, a music. It doesn't feel forced, it feels lilting.
Also the rhythm of it is very . . . wind-and-lull, like a storm.
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2012   Writer
Ah, thank you. :) Truth be told, I too don't often like rhyming poems. It limits vocabulary way too much. But sometimes, when my muse is on my side, it just works.
Reply
:iconwolf-kin:
Wolf-kin Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
That's a lovely thing. :)
Reply
:icondogmatickerr:
DogmaticKerr Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
God this is beautiful, I adore the flow you've constructed here :heart:
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2012   Writer
Thank you :)
Reply
:icondogmatickerr:
DogmaticKerr Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
:bow:
Reply
:iconnamenotrequired:
namenotrequired Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2011  Student Interface Designer
Awww. :hug: I love this! Wonderful flow with this rhythm :love:
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2011   Writer
Why thank you! :)
Reply
:iconsverak666:
Sverak666 Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2011
Wonderful imagery and word-play. I'm envious!
Thank you for sharing.
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2011   Writer
Aww, don't be envious. Be inspired, instead.
Reply
:iconvikingjon:
vikingjon Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2011  Professional General Artist
Wow. I love the visuals here "The trees were torn", "a New York hue".
Beautiful and sad.
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2011   Writer
Thank you. Rhyming poems are difficult to get just right. That's why other rhyming poets inspire me. :)
Reply
:iconvikingjon:
vikingjon Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2011  Professional General Artist
Me too. :)
Reply
:iconquonginongnong:
Quonginongnong Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2011   Writer
The natural sway of your poems is always just fantastic.
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2011   Writer
Thanks, Quonginongong. I appreciate it. :)
Reply
:iconblue-phish:
Blue-Phish Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome :D
Reply
:icondolorem-ipsum:
dolorem-ipsum Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2011   Writer
Beautiful rhyme scheme. It's so rare to find people who know how to use rhyme on this site... This is just beautiful all around.
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2011   Writer
Thanks for reading! I have to agree with you on the rhyme part. But hey- a couple years ago, I sucked at rhyming too. :D We were all there at one point or another.
Reply
:icondolorem-ipsum:
dolorem-ipsum Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2011   Writer
Indeed! I'm still there, haha.
Reply
:iconbebopboy:
Bebopboy Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2011
I really like the tone of this poem, nice imagery rhyme, and structure 8-)
Reply
:iconelegantfaith:
ElegantFaith Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2011   Writer
Thank you.
Reply
:iconblue-phish:
Blue-Phish Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Fantastic poem :D I love it. The imagery is beautiful and sad.
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